Social media has impacted our lives in so many ways – the lie of comparison dramatically impacts us (especially women) in the areas of how we keep/style our homes, how we dress, and how we parent. But it also impacts how we view and treat our spouses. The expectations that we have for our spouses.
The great news for Christian women – we acknowledge a higher calling placed on us as wives AND the Gospel gives us a better way!
Creation: Imaging God in unique ways, Adam and Eve were created differently from one another but those differences were not divisive – they were assets. They needed one another to complete the tasks given to them by God. In Eden they were unified, two becoming one, as they selflessly worked together. Living out a beautiful picture of love and harmony through worship of God alone.
Fall: When Eve doubted God had a good design for her life and union with Adam, sin and division entered the world, forever changing the marriage relationship. Now instead of being unified as husband and wife, we can act like two individuals sitting opposite of each other. Instead of out-loving one another, we look to our marriage to fulfill our own selfish desires. And if we’re Mothers – we can have the tendency to hide behind our children who we grant unconditional love to while holding our Husbands to an unattainable standard. We often live as an “I” instead of an “We” because being in a union requires us to die to self.
Redemption: Jesus loved us more than any earthly Husband ever could. Living a perfect life and purchasing our union with HIS Life. Through this sacrifice, Jesus displayed only what marriage can shadow – the Covenant love between God and His people. This love paved a way so that we could die to our selves and this happened when we were justified before the Throne. This is then played out over and over again as we are refined and sanctified for our future glory. Through Jesus’ death we are made right with God and we are one in Christ.
This is great news for believers! The same love that was in Christ to motivate Him to be patient with needy people. Kind to those who hurt Him. And long suffering for those who didn’t follow His instructions – this love is in us!
His love took Him all the way to death on the cross for us.
In Christ – this is the same love a wife can have for her Husband!!
No matter how your relationship may be with your Husband today – Let him see the work of Christ in YOU! Let Christ’s love in you be greater than your own prideful heart.
What are some things you can prayerfully work on in the way you view and interact with your Husband?
This Father’s Day, now yesterday, I found myself thinking about how good God is. This Father’s Day, I loved on my husband, and our precious son. We went to Sunday morning service and were blessed by an incredible teaching through Romans chapter 2. It was as we came to this verse, “4 Or do you show contempt for the riches of his kindness, forbearance and patience, not realizing that God’s kindness is intended to lead you to repentance?”
I remembered God’s faithfulness in my own life, a time that I did not know who He was, as in I did not know His attributes or characteristics. A time that this day caused a deep pain and suffering, a day that almost rendered me incapable of anything. Verse 4 highlights some of the characteristics of God that at that time I did not see: God’s kindness, God’s forbearance, and God’s patience.
You see, I grew up in a home where I was so aware of the brokenness of sin that I knew there had to be a good God… but I did not exactly know how to reconcile those two things.
In my home my earthly father did not love me as a father should. The hands that should have protected and nurtured instead hurt, hit, and in the darkest parts of the days and nights did even worse.
This went on for several years. As I grew up, I was able to confront the abuse and recognize the dysfunction that was present in my own life, sin is never a one and done, the ramification’s are far fetching. However, I did not have other believers in my life. The church I had been attending did not do well in teaching or leading those who had experienced deep trauma or hurt, this resulted in me being outcasted. Naturally, the secular world was ready and waiting. It was as I embarked on this therapeutic journey that I came dangerously close to redefining God and the Gospel to be what I felt safe with.
If you have experienced deep hurt or abandonement from your Father, I am so very sorry. If you have experienced this, chances are you too have wrestled with the idea of God being a man, you have probably wrestled with the idea of the Trinity, and maybe friend you still are and that is ok. Thankfully, God is so patient with us and He knows our hearts AND our hurts. It was during this phase of therapy that my therapist, who had a theology degree and identified as a christian, said ” Maybe you should view god as a spirit form, or as ANYTHING you want. God doesn’t have to be male…”
At first this prickled my ears! I mean this sounded good! It sounded EASY! But… God gently called out to me, a quiet whisper in my heart, “You know this is not true” “You were made for more, you were made for ME”.
What my therapist was suggesting… Well this was the very thing, the very tactic, that satan used in the garden with Eve… But did God really say? This tactic was effective then and remains effective today. Our current culture will have us read all the self help books and take all the personality tests, we are eager to do this even! But what if… the best measure of knowing who we are is to know WHO God is? You see I had a big problem with trying to make God more like me, when in reality I need to be more like Him. The enemy is so tricky because this same snare is what allowed for me to view my good and perfect God, through the relationship I experienced with my sinful, evil, and broken earthly father.
The enemy told me God was the same as my earthy father.
God’s word told me: Jeremiah 9:24, “but let him who boasts boast in this, that he understands and knows me, that I am the Lord who practices steadfast love, justice, and righteousness in the earth. For in these things I delight, declares the Lord.”
We were made in the image of God. We are made to know Him, and we are made to reflect His image to the world around us. Knowing God is critically essential to having a foundation in our relationship with Him. It is essential to grow in our knowledge of Him in order to live the Christian life. It is of significant importance because the way we view God (or do not view Him) impacts every other area of our lives; relationships, sin, worship, and healing. So it is no wonder that the very first thing the enemy wants us to call into question is who God is. If satan can distort this one area than the entirety of our belief system is on sandy ground, our faith will be shaky. If satan can cause us to question who God is then we will call into question God’s word.
God’s word is the very thing by which we come to believe and to know who He is and who we are, and of equal importance who we are not. The gospel is the very best Good News ever!
I want to share with you some of the things that helped me the most during my crisis of faith, the TRUTH’s that God used to draw me back to Him, to stay.
First thing, recognizing that the Bible is compromised of 66 books, with many stories, that make up ONE big story. The story of God’s love for us. When I discovered the metanarrative of the Bible it gave me an outline for development of my theology. As I studied individually and collectively the acts of creation, the fall, redemption, and restoration, I began to clearly see God’s mercy. In the stories that before seemed horrible and sad, say the entire first five books of the Old Testament, now were overflowing with God’s patience and mercy for His people. Instead of feeling confused about God sending Adam and Eve out of the garden, I could see the truth of His love for them and His protecting them from eating of the tree of life and thereby permanently separating mankind from Himself. When I read about how God clothed Adam and Eve, I now seen that the Lord Himself committed the first blood sacrifice for us, He loved us that much! When the Lord cursed the serpent, He also gave His best promise of a future redeemer who would put all things right again. I began to see Jesus throughout the whole Bible. OK, I recognize I am straying off my main point but I get so excited thinking about those early days of discovering God’s word being alive and active in my life and everyday moments.
The next area of study that was integral to my growing in the Lord and being submissive in what He was showing and saying to me was studying HIM. Studying His characteristiscs and attributes, clearly defining terms per His standard, as He is the creator of all things. Here is where I realized just how misled I had previously been. I began to realize the way I used terms like goodness and justice were really subjective because I hadn’t fully identified an objective standard for them. When pressed my faith was called into question because my foundation had significant damage… Below are just a few of the attributes that made an immediate difference in my ability to recognize a good God, a good FATHER, despite the suffering I endured by my earthly father. Now, I do want to be clear, knowing these things did take time to live out. It was painful. I spent equal amounts of time crying out to the Lord. This time though, I was humbled and submissive, I wasn’t asking for any “thing”. I was asking for more of HIM – for Him to show me how to take all the pain I had experienced in my life and turn it into an offering of praise. And that my friends, while it is so difficult for us is only a small thing for our lord, He is faithful to do so much more than we ask for…
God looks down from heaven on the children of man to see if there are any who understand, who seek after God. (Psalm 53:2)
FAITHFUL – God is incapable of anything but fidelity. He is loyally devoted to His plan and purpose. Scripture References: 2 Tim 2:13 / Deut. 7:9 / Heb. 10:23
OMNIPOTENT – God is all powerful. His strength is unlimited. Scripture References: Mat. 19:26 / Job 42:1-2 / Jer. 32:27
OMNIPRESENT – God is everywhere. His presence is near and permeating. Scripture References: Prov. 15:3; Psalm 139:7-10 / Jer. 23:23-24
HOLY – God is undefiled and unable to be in the presence of defilement. He is sacred and set-apart. Scripture References: Rev. 4:8 / Lev. 19:2 / Hab. 1:13
INCOMPREHENSIBLE & TRANSCENDENT – God is high above and beyond human understanding. He is unable to be fully known. Scripture References: Ps. 145:3 / IS. 55:8-9 / Rom. 11:33-36
IMMUTABLE – GOD DOES NOT CHANGE. He is the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow. Scripture References: 1 Sam. 15:29 / Rom. 11:29 / James 1:17
SOVEREIGN – God governs over all things. He is in complete control. Scripture References: Col. 1:17 / Ps. 24:1-2 / 1 Chron. 29:11-12
JUST – God governs in perfect justice. He acts in accordance with justice. In Him, there is no wrongdoing or dishonesty. Scripture References: Is. 61:8 / Deut. 32:4 / Ps. 146:7-9
LOVING – God is eternally, enduringly, steadfastly loving and affectionate. He does not forsake or betray His covenant love. Scripture References: Jn. 3:16 / Eph. 2:4-5 / 1 Jn. 4:16
This is just a short list that in itself could be hours and hours of study. I hope this is helpful to you and I pray that wherever you are in you journey that the TRUTH of God’s word comforts you and leads you to your good shepherd, to our good Father. As God’s creation, we were made for worship. We will worship, whether it is for His glory or our destruction, we get to decide. I pray that today you will find Him in the quiet moments, the loud moments, the hurting moments, and that you too will ask Him to turn your sufferings into offerings of praise. I pray that you will use the low place you may be experiencing as a new viewpoint for looking up at the cross.
God is and will be faithful to do far more that you can ask.
This time of the year it is really easy to take our eyes off of the Reason for the Season: Jesus.
It is easy to start looking around at what others have, maybe it is their gifts or finances. Or maybe it’s something larger like their marriages, family or children. Things that are not inherently wrong to long for or desire.
But friends, let me encourage you to remember, seek the vertical first and foremost – then the horizontal may come. But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.” (Matthew 6:33).
We mustn’t forget that we should be pursing holiness, holiness anchored of course in the grace of God. “But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do; for it is written: “Be holy, because I am holy.” (1 Peter 1:15-16). Salvation is by grace and sanctification is by grace.
Holiness in finances. Holiness in relationships. Holiness in sexuality.
“For you know God paid a ransom for you to save you from the empty life you inherited from your ancestors. And it was not paid with mere gold or silver, which loose their value. It was the precious blood of Christ, the sinless, spotless Lamb of God. God chose him as your ransom, long before the world began, but now in these last days he has been revealed for your sake.” (1 Peter 18-20).
The Holy Spirit enables us in this pursuit but we are 100% responsible for this pursuit; as we are 100% dependent upon the Holy Spirit to enable us.
“The pursuit of holiness is a joint venture between God and the Christian. No one can attain any degree of holiness without God working in his life, but just as surely no one will attain it without effort on his own part.” – Jerry Bridges
Stop seeking satisfaction.
Seek God.
Experience true satisfaction that is only found in God.
Sometimes in the quiet hours of early morning the Lord blesses me in the most unexpected ways.
Every morning of late Jackson, my three-year-old son, has been getting up incredibly early and I find myself grumbling from the struggles of the day before or worse even dreading the struggles of the day to come.
But not Jackson. The very FIRST thing he does each morning is find the light. Sometimes the light gets in through the expected places and sometimes it gets in through the unexpected places.
Regardless, he goes to it, he squats down and he basks in it. After he rests in this light, he then goes and get his “friends for the day” and he holds them up in the light too. He share this light with those closest to him.
What a beautiful picture of the grace God gives us each day. Grace that enables us to give grace to others. A picture of how His mercies are new each morning. This morning I stopped and rested in the light with Jackson. We prayed and I paused, humbly accepting that I once again have began to rely on myself more than Jesus to get through the hard. I grabbed my Bible and spent some time in the light. I found rest at the feet of Jesus, I found rest soaking in HIS word.
Children are a blessing from God in profound ways.
Jackson has a way of reminding me what is important when I forget. For a season I found myself sitting with him (still do) for long hours through the night – often beside the bathtub trying to soothe him. During that season the Lord impressed on my heart, “If you cannot even be still for your son, how than can you be still for me?”.
This season the Lord is using Jackson to remind me that life is found in the light of the world. In the life and grace of Jesus.
Lord forgive me, and help me to not resent these moments and days and months of intense pressure. Help me to recognize the gifts of these moments to help me to strive to enter the rest that is coming. Help me to do all things in the strength that YOU Lord provide.
“Jesus called a little child to him and put the child among them. Then he said, “I tell you the truth, unless you turn from your sins and become like little children, you will never get into the Kingdom of Heaven. So anyone who becomes as humble as this little child is the greatest in the Kingdom of Heaven. “And anyone who welcomes a little child like this on my behalf is welcoming me.” Matthew 18:2-5 NLT